Wanna Psychoanalyse me ?

Natasha had taken me with her for shopping. I was not good at buying stuff, and so, I was not, I was only holding it for her. She was getting married in about a week now. I loved her dearly, but was not the one who was marrying her. She was beautiful. She was perfect for me. I wanted to do to her what I used to think of doing to every other girl. Now she was my aim in life. I loved her skin. Her smell, her touch, everything. She had real soft skin, was white complexioned and was real fun to be around. I, on the other hand was totally boring. I did not know how to talk to people. People usually disliked me, but I never cared. I only cared about one thing which I wanted to do with her. I had known her for about a week now and was only searching for the right moment all the time to say the magical words to her.

And once again she had brought me to the mall. This was the fourth day in the week we were here shopping. My urge now was growing too fast and I was unable to control myself. But I was aware that I could do it here in a public place or at her home for that matter. I had to somehow take her to some place where no one would be able to find her. And I think the way she has started trusting me now, it would be a great time to do it. I even knew the best place to do it ! As we proceeded to more and more shops, I kept on planning on how to take her there and how to do it. I was totally stuck on her since the last about an hour when she said that we needed to go back. So, I started to feel excited about it. On reaching the car, she handed me her car keys to drive us home not knowing that I had totally something different on my mind.

I took her to some half constructed building which was abandoned a month ago. I told her that I would show her something good and hanging my backpack, asked her to walk by me. She got out and said that she was now feeling scared of me. I told her that it was nothing to be scared about and that I would really like if she saw what I wanted to show her. So she agreed to see it. All was going according to the plan. I walked her up the stairs to the topmost floor and asked her to wait. She waited while I took out a transparent raincoat and put it on. She laughed at me for wearing a raincoat in such a sunny weather. I told her that this was for the protection which I guess she did not understand. Then she started talking about things related to her marriage. She hadn't even started to talk about her fiance that she saw a big knife coming out of my bag. She asked my why I kept this with me. Now, her tone seemed scared and I started to enjoy the moment. I told her that this was to ease things when the blood gets out of control. She panicked on hearing the word blood, but stood there waiting for a better response from me. I looked at her. She was almost dead. I smiled at her.

Next I went up to her, held her hand, ready to say those magical words to her. I said,"I want to kill you !". She did not understand at first, but my next movement made her understand really who I was. I pushed in the knife into her throat, making sure that I cut her main artery, which will not lead to death but will make her unconscious for a while. The blood spat right at my face. Ohh the sensation of killing yet another girl ! I was again amazed at myself for being so good at it. I lay her down right there. She was now to be my puppet. Now she had to listen to what I was saying, silently ! I told her all about myself, why no one would talk to me, why no one liked me, all. As I finished, she was almost dead ! I liked the impassive look on her face. No expression, nothing ! Just a soft cute face. Next I thought I would skin her. I stripped her, laying her on her stomach, thinking of a design to carve on her body. But before I could do anything, I heard a commotion and had to run away from there.

I went back home, washed my hands and face. Threw away the raincoat, burying it at an isolated place and just then remembered ! I forgot my knife right there where I stripped her ! I ran back to that place. Someone had been there and had called the police. The place was now a crime scene ! No ! How could I do such a mistake ?! I had to get back my knife or I was gone for life. All her family knew that I was with her and it was only my knife which could be traced back to me. I had already pushed her car off a cliff, so that we were not noticed being in the building. But that knife was killing me. I told an officer that I had seen her in the mall that day as she had asked me to help her with some of her bags. He told me some stupid theory of theirs on the murder, and then I asked him, what was used for the murder. He told me that a knife had been used which they had taken in custody and was back in their car. Nice ! So now I knew the position of my knife, just had to find a way to get it back from the police.

I climbed down the stairs to the police car where all the items at the scene were being loaded. They had already put in the knife and were now loading unnecessary stuff. I had to wait and wait I did, behind the police barriers that had now been set up. One of the officers who was loading the items came near the barriers to shoo the reporters away but could not make any effect on them. I thought of some thing.

The reporters were getting violent at times and were falling on the barriers such that the police were handling them back and forth. I went back behind the crowd and paid a few people who were there to push the crowd as hard as they could. As they did it the people in the front fell in violently. As they fell down on and beyond the barriers, I ran near the police car and snatched my knife putting it inside my shirt so that no one could see it and then pretended to be falling inside with the people there. Te police pushed me out beyond the barriers and once again I was free!

I went back home, arranged my killing items and sat at my dinner thinking about the mistakes that I made in doing my killing today and how I could improve for the next time !