The call for help | Heart and Brain in conflict | Part 4

His eyes open. His neck is hurting. His back is also hurting. It doesn't seem like he would be able to get out of bed today. He stretches a bit, trying to wake up. As he starts moving, he feels movement on the other side of the bed. He is super scared. He finds Ishani on the other side of the bed, sleeping sound. WHAT? How did he get here ? What happened last night ? Why does he not have his clothes on ? Did he just have a sleepover with Ishani ? He couldn't make sense of anything and was too scared to wake her up and talk to her at all.

He gets off the bed, tries to find his clothes. He has never been in this apartment. He has to get out quickly! And he does. He quickly puts on his pants, and shirt. He checks his pockets quickly, where he finds his phone and wallet, already in place. Then he quietly tiptoes out of the apartment, wears his shoes on the staircase outside of the apartment, leading to the parking lot. Where is he now ? Why is my head hurting ? What happened last night ? He takes his phone out, checks for the directions to his home. He had a fifteen minute walk ahead of him to try to remember what happened last night, and how he ended up with Ishani instead of Shikha.

He was able to remember the kiss with Shikha.

"Then I got her call... yes", he remembered. "Oh yes, I also remember walking to her apartment. All the way I was having second thoughts about why I was going back to comfort her, but I did not listen to my gut", he was thinking to himself. He put his hand on his neck and tried to crack it, side to side. It cracked, but it still hurt him. 

Slowly he started remembering what happened last night.

"And I thought I was dreaming. Seems like everything happened for real.", he kept thinking to himself, "So, okay, putting it back together. She called me for help when I was waving Shikha goodbye. I received her call, in which she asked me if I could come over to her place, as she wanted to talk about her relationship with this guy. Yes! The guy! So, I went to comfort her. I had to, I think. She used to be someone I cared about a lot. We haven't talked in over two months, but I think I had to go to comfort her. I also had never been to her apartment. So, I put maps to her apartment, and walked from Shikha's place directly. Yes, she was crying when I got there. I made her sit, drink some water, calm down, and then asked her to tell me about it."

He stopped walking. Saw a bench on the sidewalk and sat on it. He remembered everything crystal clear. He could play everything in his eyes, almost like that episode of Black Mirror. He just did not need any chip, he could remember a lot of things.

He saw how he listened to her talk about her boyfriend. He remembered her telling him everything about it. She started with how she used to see him in her library, and she found him to be super cute. She slid a note in his hand one day which said that she thought he was cute. After which that guy investigated her phone number and directly texted on Telegram. They started talking more and more and she started liking his tiny little romantic gestures like sliding a chocolate in her pocket when no one was noticing. They did not want anyone to get to know of their relationship so, they tried to keep everything under wraps. Tried to avoid being seen together in public or even in the library where there were cameras. And then they had a conversation about marriage, and how she is looking to marry someone, and he feels like he is too young for marriage. She mentioned saying to him that he was not marriage material anyway, and that she was not ever thinking of marrying him. She also mentioned that her boyfriend asked if he was temporary, to which she said yes, directly, without manipulating the words that might have hurt him deeply.

"Everything changed after that!", he remembered her making this statement.

He also remembered this statement, because everything changed after that for him and her as well. She started crying, and he hugged her in trying to console her. Should not have done that. 

You could feel that he was getting stressed thinking about what happened next. He was not proud of what he had done to comfort someone. At the same time, he was pretty sure that this meant nothing to her. A chill started going down his spine. He could not stop thinking. His throat started choking. He had never felt this before. His hands started shaking and he crouched forward, pressing his elbows against his thighs, trying to stop his hands from shaking. He tried very hard to stop it, but a tear trickled down his right eye, all the way to the outer right side of his upper lip. He could taste the disgust of what he just did. He could feel his soul leaving him, betray him and every part of his body. He could clearly play it in his eyes, what happened between him and her in that moment.

"And I loved her!", another tear rolled down the left cheek. He was not able to keep calm anymore. He was not able to control his tears anymore. He felt like this was the worst moment of his life, and he never wanted to remember this moment, or her, anymore. At the same time, he was not able to get the image out of his head. Sitting on that bench early morning, he could not think of anything else at all. He was feeling weak. He felt like he wanted to talk to someone about it. But who ?

"Shikha!"

"Oh wait! Shikha!", another wave of chill hit him.

"She needs to know!". She did need to know.

He stood up from the bench. Took out his phone to see he had just received a message from her. She sent a link, an Instagram post. He felt it was not important and started to type out a message. He wanted to talk to her in person about this, and the earlier he was able to talk to her, the better he would feel.

"What does she mean you just left her apartment?", said her next message.

"What ?", he thought, "what's in the Instagram post?" He opened the link, it opened on his browser since he did not have the app. It was a picture of him with Ishani. "This does not seem right...", he mumbled, "why did she post this, this is an old picture of us together!" He opened the description of that post, and he had to sit back down on the bench. His eyes widened, as he read those words.

"The man who is perfect for me! 

Just left my apartment! I let him think he was sneaking out..."

That description ended with so many emojis, and none of those could describe how he felt in that moment.